Moms :)

Even though I write this blog mostly about my father, I know that my mother was equally as (if not more) influential on my childhood. Whereas I associate my dad with negative things and pain, my mother represents everything good and positive in my childhood. She was the antithesis of my dad- she was sober, kind, patient, loving. Maybe she did not always know what was the best way to protect my sister and me, she did everything in her power to fill our childhoods with happy memories. She was a class mom, my girl scout leader, etc. My sister and I are unusually close to our mom and if anything, she overcompensated for how our dad treated us. Now, she’s not a saint and I had to forgive her a long time ago for not getting my sister and me away from my dad, but now that I am a divorced adult woman, I can understand a little more how hard it was for her. My mom is one of my best friends and I can go to her literally about anything- my day is not complete unless I hear her voice on the phone. I know that even though my dad affected my childhood so, so much, that my mom is the reason that I am a responsible, caring, sensitive, thoughtful, philanthropic, animal loving, craft show attending teacher and adult.

Happy Mother’s Day to all of you 🙂

“Moms are better than dads”

Let me preface this blog by saying that this clearly does not apply to all dads (or all moms, for that matter). I have been fortunate to know many good fathers- my friend has a pretty great dad, my boyfriend’s dad is amazing and my own grandfather was a wonderful father to my mother and my aunt. It is just that in my case, the title of this blog is true (which is why I have a tshirt that also says it lol… which I only break out on Mother’s Day because who will argue with me then?)

My mom is amazing and even though I do not agree with all of her life choices, she has been nothing but caring and supportive of her two daughters. She is generous with money, time, advice and love. She asks for nothing in return and I know, unequivocally, that she lives for my sister and me. What makes her happy is us being happy, which is a characteristic very common in good moms. Because of this, my sister and I try to show her how special she is, especially on Mother’s Day and her birthday. It is not about lavish, expensive gifts- my mother has very simple taste and treats a Vera Bradley bag she receives as if it was Gucci. My sister and I put a lot of thought into the gifts we get my mother and that is obvious.

I have to admit, though, that I do feel a little guilty that the scales are so tipped when it comes to celebrating my mother versus my father. Many would argue (and do) that he is not deserving of anything. If you read my last blog, you will remember that he actually returns almost everything we give him. He also criticizes gifts- my favorite Father’s Day story of all time was when I bought him two polo shirts from Macys and they accidentally charged my credit card for $.50 instead of $50. I was excited about the “perfect crime” at first, but then my father started sending emails that my sister and I wouldn’t even spend $5.00 on a gift for him. Ahhh…the irony!

I know my dad does not deserve the same treatment we give my mother because he does not treat us the way my mother does. But I do feel that little twinge of discomfort when he clearly sees the things we do for her. I just have to remind myself that no matter what we did for him, he would find something to complain about. See, my mother is the “Oh my! A macaroni necklace! You MADE this all by yourself? It’s BEAUTIFUL!” type and my dad is the “I am going to say thank you when I open the gift, return it asap and then send several days worth of emails complaining about my do nothing taker daughters” type.

Happy Mother’s Day to all the great moms out there 🙂