I just found out that my best friend’s mother (I call her “Ma”) recently relapsed. She had been sober for 14 years. It is a reminder of how deep and strong addictions really can be. This is on top of my cousin relapsing after 12 years of sobriety over the summer. It makes me sad because I truly believed both of them had conquered their addictions. I do not mean to sound judgmental, because I still admire the journeys both my cousin and Ma have taken, even if they are now both experiencing setbacks. I am confident that Ma will get back on track and start over with AA (I’m not so sure about my cousin…she is battling meth and doesn’t seem to really acknowledge her problem).
I actually have written about Ma before. I have known her since I was 12 (so over 20 years now) and I saw her at her worst. Watching her become sober gave me hope. Hope that people can change, although strangely it never gave me hope that my father would stop drinking. That would take much more than just hope!!
I know firsthand that noone can stop another person from drinking or using and they have to want help…I just pray that both my cousin and my Ma find their way back to being sober.
Anxious ACOA 
The grief of knowing that life always changes, sometimes not for the better. The sadness that comes from watching people you love not being able to love themselves. Those who relapse need to know that your love is unconditional and that you will always be their cheerleader! Good Luck to them both, and to YOU!
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Thank you for taking the time to respond. You are so right that it is hard to watch someone go through such a difficult time and not be able to help them. At least both of them have seen how much better a life of sobriety can be so they have something to work towards!
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I pray that will be enough for them to choose the better path! I really think so much of it is determined by your capacity to love yourself, very difficult for some.
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I agree!!
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This inspires me but scares me too. I guess it proves that in the end, we are only human and that we are not perfect.
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That is definitely true. I do know that the rate of relapsing is quite high in recovery, but I guess since it has been so long for both of them, I stopped thinking about that possibility.
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I know that this may sound really pathetic in comparison, but I can relate even though I have no experience with traditional substance abuse. I think part of the problem is that people often end up doing something detrimental as a coping mechanism when something bad happens in their lives or when they just don’t know how to act, deal with a situation or person etc – and after that it often becomes a vicious circle.
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That’s not even a little pathetic and I appreciate you commenting- it’s actually really insightful. I do not have an addiction problem, but I definitely have some coping mechanisms that are not healthy (like having anxiety, etc).
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Oh I hear ya – I get panic attacks, chronic tension headache…oh yeah, and I’m an emotional eater. So I definitely know about unhealthy coping mechanisms! LOL
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We are a couple of hot messes 😉
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LOL ain’t that the truth!
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Imagine no addiction.
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I literally can’t. I would have a completely different life!
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