I am currently in the process of hypnotherapy in order to conquer my fear of flying and traveling. I have mixed feelings about how it is going, but am hopeful that it will help (and I am willing to try anything at this point). I had an interesting conversation with the hypnotherapist this week. I asked him how much of my current issues he thinks could be related to growing up with an alcoholic. Although I have always assumed there was a connection between my problem with anxiety and my childhood, I have never blamed any of my adult problems on what happened to me as a child, but we are shaped by our early experiences. I have explored this connection with my regular therapist (yes, count ’em- two therapists- lol), but I was curious to know another person’s professional opinion.
I found what he said to be really interesting. I know that the fears I have associated with travel really stem from an issue with the lack of control. He said that the connection is that when I was younger and my dad was completely out of control, I developed a coping mechanism to be able to live in the house with him. The hypnotherapist was very complimentary in that he thinks I have achieved a lot of success due to this self and environmental control, but that in this situation with traveling, it is a huge hindrance. That really makes a lot of sense on a very fundamental level. I couldn’t control my dad…his behavior was completely unpredictable. So instead, I tried to control everything else I could and it has now manifested itself in a really unhealthy way.
Anyway, not sure if anyone can relate to this revelation (of sorts) or to this feeling of needing to have control. For the record, I do not think I am controlling of other people, but really just of my surroundings and myself. Also, if anyone has ever been medically hypnotized, I would be very interested in your experience!!
Anxious ACOA 
Very nice story and I am a very controlling person he is a alcoholic but will not admit it and its a hard life I enjoyed your story keep writing
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Thank you so much. That’s tough when someone just can’t see it (or they can and won’t admit it). Hang in there and make sure you always put yourself and your needs first!
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Hey! Isn’t it ironic that we both wrote a post the same day? With similar revelations…. You rock, keep telling and sharing. In my eyes u r a do something GIVER!! Honestly I used to be such a control fanatic, for obvious reasons. Not sure how, but I am not that way anymore.
You will conquer and rise above(no pun intended!) lol
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Ha- I guess it is true what they say about great minds thinking alike! You are so sweet and thank you for your response. I am hoping that I will continue on the path of trying to be less controlling and then perhaps one day I can just let things be!!
Let’s see if our blogs overlap again in the future lol 😉
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Having grown up within an alcoholism family and the chaos that marked that type of existence, I can totally relate! My need to control came out in the way I had to keep my house and the fact that rides scare the shit out of me, rollercoasters, even Ferris wheels! Luckily I can fly although my son is a pilot and you should of seen my first ride in his small plane. I truly thought my heart would pound out of my chest!! It is all about the lack of control and the imprinting of that feeling that came when we were children within the unpredictable world of our alcoholic parent. The good news is that you have help and there is hope. I applaud your efforts and thank God for good therapists!!
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Thank you for your response. I meant to write you earlier, but now I was really thinking about what you wrote because of that horrible story about that poor woman at the Six Flags in Texas who died on the roller coaster. I am guessing stories like that make it even harder for you? Reading about stories about plane crashes don’t scare me at all because I am not afraid of that aspect of flying…I am just afraid of the desperate need to get off the plane and not being able to (which sounds ridiculous even as I write it!) It would actually be easier for me (I think) to go in a little plane with your son than a big plane…because I would have the semblance of control (without the delays and problems that come with the airport).
I hope that all this therapy pays off…I always joke that he owes me for the copays 😉
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I am a total control freak as I was always the caretaker of two alcoholic parents and 3 siblings. SNRI helping a lot as well as therapy! What’s the prognosis on hypnotherapy?
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